According to OregonLive, Chezarae Walter got pulled over speeding out of a WinCo Supermarket while driving a stolen vehicle she had put through the wringer.
But despite the prosecution's objections, the judge let her off...
...with the payment of one Baja Blast Mountain Dew.
Why one Baja Blast?
The owner of the stolen vehicle, Peter Higginbotham (yes, really), recognized his 1996 Toyota Camry because it had a funny bumper sticker that read:
"The book value of my car is one Baja Blast."
Being a typical bleeding heart Portlander, Higginbotham didn't want to see Chezarae go to jail for stealing his car, so he asked the judge if Chezarae and him could work out a civil compromise instead: One Baja Blast for one car.
Practically the first words out of Multnomah County Circuit Judge Jeffrey Auxier's mouth were, ‘You worked out a smoking hot agreement!'
Because that how judges in Portland talk, you know.
Prosecutor Jacob Rhoads asked the judge not to approve the civil compromise, calling the resolution ‘not appropriate' and noting that the woman had prior property crime and theft convictions.
But the judge overruled him saying,
The bottom line is the victim in this case doesn't want this to proceed, and I've heard enough to be satisfied that you are on a path in life that has potential. The state has enough cases to prosecute.
Higgenbotham got his Baja Blast (which he doesn't even like), Chezarae walked free and clear, and the insurance company got stuck with a $1,700 bill for the 30-year-old car she destroyed.
Portland!
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